It's not that things don't happen in my life, it's that, mostly, they would require too much explanation to be worth posting.

I almost hit two otters when I was driving to work this morning There was no way to stop, too much traffic behind and too my left, no margin to the right because it was at a bridge (which is why I'm going with them being otters). The one in the lead got all the way across the bridge ahead of the traffic, the one following ended up right squarly in front of me. I let off the brake and cringed, heard a thump, then looked in the rearview and saw him running back off the way he had come. I passed directly over him and the thump must have been a bump in the road.

Chasing after girls will shorten your life.